Meet my beautiful baby, my black book. my journal. my diary. Memoirs Of Abbie. I got this from Barnes and Noble and it was mostly because of the grid on the pages that made it stand out. It is so soft and flexible unlike the hard leather bound journals. The leather strap with studs is just my wrap-around bracelet that I am definitely going to keep as a journal tie now. You need leather ties for a journal. This one is pretty hardcore = ME. I shamelessly confess that I have ripped pages out of this journal's start at least 3 times to give it the right start. It takes time to find your voice, and once you do, the conversations with your self never stop. You need to talk to yourself because unless you do, you will forget your own voice.
LORD OF THE RINGS QUOTE AT THE BEGINNING
To begin, I wrote the most quote from Lord Of The Rings that resonates in my memory for an entire lifetime. Sam said these words to a torn, defeated Frodo in The Twin Towers. I do realize that despite swimming upstream, against the current, in a river of psycho-social turmoil, there definitely is something good that I am fighting for. These words are a reinstatement of the ultimate mission of life.
And I penned down the title of Chapter XXVIII which is my current year. It's drawing to a close in 2 and a half months but I would have written a lot about inner demons and how them and I have been in combat this year. Of course, it will be a boast of my victory but the battle is never ending. This definitely was the demon fighting year and I have slayed quite a few: got rid of pain-in-the-you-know-what people, turned deaf to destructive criticism, and the like. I still have a super long way to go.
All the black shades are responsible for pushing me towards writing. It is my catharsis. A retreat. Unless I realize my strengths and polish them, I am going to sink terribly. Nobody liked Titanic when it was sinking. It was great when Jack Dawson was screaming "I'm the king of the world."